Rediscover Your Hopes, Create New Possibilities and Shape a Future You Actually Want
When You Were Younger, What Did You Imagine Your Life Would Look Like?
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Perhaps you were going to: travel the world.
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Own a particular car.
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Climb a mountain.
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Start your own business.
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Live beside the sea.
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Fall deeply in love.
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Write a book.
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Have a family.
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Buy your own home.
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Or simply have enough money and freedom to enjoy life without constantly worrying.
Can you remember what you wanted?
And perhaps the bigger question is:
What happened to those dreams?
Life has a habit of getting in the way
Most of us don't deliberately decide to abandon our dreams.
Life simply happens.
We work. We pay bills. We raise families. We care for parents. Relationships change. Bodies change. Money becomes tight. Responsibilities grow.
One year quietly turns into another.
And somewhere along the way, the dreams that once seemed so important get pushed to the back of the cupboard along with the good china and that mysterious electrical cable nobody dares throw away.
Then one day we look around and wonder:
Is this actually the life I wanted?
That can be an uncomfortable question.
But it can also be an incredibly powerful one.
Because your story isn't finished.
How has your life gone so far?
Not how should it have gone.
Not how somebody else thinks it should have gone.
How has your life gone?
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What are you proud of?
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What surprised you?
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What did you achieve that your younger self would never have believed possible?
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What didn't happen?
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What did you let go of?
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And what do you still quietly wish you had done?
There is no need for blame or regret.
This is simply about becoming curious.
Sometimes looking backwards helps us understand what we want to do next.
I knew very young what I wanted to do
I was about eight or nine years old when I decided I wanted to become an osteopath.
Apparently applying to an osteopathic college at eleven years old wasn't their usual admissions procedure!
But I could not be swayed.
In 1991, I qualified from the British School of Osteopathy in London, and I have loved my vocation ever since.
Looking back, I think one reason I had such clarity was that I already understood something important about myself.
What really mattered to me was making a difference to people.
Osteopathy became one way of doing that.
But it certainly wasn't the only way.
As my life has evolved, that same desire has led me into coaching, health education, healing and eventually the creation of Aligned Later Life.
The expression has changed. The underlying purpose hasn't.
You don't have to discover one enormous 'life purpose'
People can become terribly serious about finding their purpose.
As though somewhere in the universe there is an envelope marked:
“YOUR OFFICIAL PURPOSE. DO NOT LOSE.”
I don't think it always works like that.
Your purpose may be something much simpler.
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Perhaps you love creating.
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Helping.
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Teaching.
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Exploring.
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Healing.
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Building.
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Nurturing.
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Leading.
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Learning.
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Connecting people.
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Growing things.
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Making people laugh.
Your purpose may also change expression as you move through life.
What mattered to you at 25 may look very different at 55, 65 or 75.
That doesn't mean you have lost your way.
You may simply be ready for the next version of yourself.
Midlife isn't the end of the adventure
Nor is retirement.
Nor is becoming a grandparent.
Nor is turning 70.
One of the most damaging ideas about ageing is that life gradually becomes smaller.
It doesn't have to.
Yes, reality matters.
Your health, mobility, finances or responsibilities may affect what is possible.
If your childhood ambition was to become an Olympic gymnast and you are now 78 with two replacement hips, we may need to negotiate slightly.
The feeling behind the dream may still be available though. Connect with that NOW.
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Adventure.
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Freedom.
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Creativity.
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Achievement.
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Connection.
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Contribution.
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Joy.
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Fun.
Perhaps the original dream needs updating rather than abandoning.
Ask yourself: what do I still want?
Not what is sensible.
Not what the family expects.
Not what somebody of your age is supposedly meant to want.
What do YOU want?
Try completing these sentences: Grab a pen and paper, handwritten is best!
Before I die, I would love to...
Something I have always wanted to learn is...
A place I would love to visit is...
Something I would regret never trying is...
If I knew I couldn't fail, I would...
If money wasn't the main issue, I would...
And perhaps most importantly:
What would make me feel more alive?
Don't censor your answers.
You aren't signing a contract. You are allowing yourself to imagine.
That is where possibility begins.
Some dreams can start very small
A dream doesn't have to involve selling the house and trekking across Patagonia.
Perhaps you want to paint again.
Learn Italian.
Grow vegetables.
Take singing lessons.
Reconnect with somebody.
Start dating.
Volunteer.
Write down your life stories for your grandchildren.
Sail.
Dance.
Learn something completely new.
Turn a hobby into a small business.
Book the holiday you keep talking about.
Or finally make decisions that give you greater peace of mind about your future.
Small actions can create surprisingly large changes.
And some dreams really ARE big
Good! Let them be big. You need things that make your eyes light up.
If there is somewhere you have always wanted to visit, investigate it.
If you want greater financial freedom, start learning what options are available to you.
If you want better health, find out what you can begin changing now.
If you want a completely different way of living, explore what that might look like.
You don't need to know every step before you begin.
You only need to discover the next one.
Don't confuse 'not yet' with 'never'
This is particularly important as we get older.
It is very easy to say:
"I'm too old now."
"It's too late."
"I should have done it years ago."
"People will think I'm ridiculous."
"What's the point at my age?"
What's the point?
You are still here.
That's the point.
There is life left to live. There are conversations you haven't had yet.
Places you haven't seen. People you haven't met.
Things you haven't learned. Laughter you haven't laughed.
And probably parts of yourself you haven't even discovered yet.
Give your Future You something to thank you for
Imagine yourself five years from now…. That version of you is looking back at today.
What would you like them to be grateful that you started?
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Maybe it was looking after your health.
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Having an important conversation.
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Getting your finances organised.
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Booking the adventure.
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Changing where you live.
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Joining the group.
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Starting the course.
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Writing the first page.
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Asking for help.
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Or simply allowing yourself to dream again.
Your future isn't created in one enormous dramatic moment.
It is shaped by the decisions you make today.
Your challenge
Give yourself ten quiet minutes.
Take a piece of paper and write:
What do I still want from my life?
Then keep writing.
Don't correct it.
Don't make it realistic.
Don't worry about HOW you are going to achieve any of it yet.
Just listen to yourself. Keep writing!…
Some answers may surprise you.
And if one idea gives you a little flutter of excitement, curiosity or even nervousness, pay attention.
There may be life in it.
One final thought
You cannot go backwards and rewrite your past.
But you absolutely can decide what you want to do with the life that remains in front of you.
So dust off an old dream.
Create a completely new one.
Take one small step, then another…
Your age does not automatically determine the size of your future.
And your dreams most certainly do not have a use-by date.
Carpe diem. Seize the day.
And perhaps give your Future You something wonderful to thank you for.
Gayle Palmer
Aligned Later Life
www.alignedlaterlife.com
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